Every so often, I come down with a powerful infection known as baby fever. Something usually triggers it, like something I saw in a movie, a pregnant woman, or in this case, people I know having babies. And once it strikes, I can’t stop thinking about wanting to have a baby myself.
There are so many reasons why I want to have a baby. The idea of Cory and I creating our own miniature version of us together is exciting. It’s something that will be just ours— a new adventure for us to journey through together. Besides that, I love the idea of being a mother. Taking care of a child, my child, is one of the things that I feel I was made for. Guiding another human being through life is a challenge and a privilege that I am looking forward to taking on. Plus, I don’t know if there is any other thing you can do in life that will build as much character as being a parent will. Children can teach you patience, unconditional love, maturity, responsibility, self-sacrifice, gentleness, and so much more. What a wonderful tool that God gave us to make us more like him!
But I also know that there are, shall we say, disadvantages to being a parent. Children are incredibly demanding. As a babysitter/nanny, I am becoming more and more familiar with this concept. Children, particularly babies, need your constant attention. It is an all day, every day job. Not only do they need your constant attention but they need constant guidance as well. Babies are new to the world and as such, they don’t know what anything is. They love to touch and play with everything, and that can be terribly dangerous as well as destructive! So you have to try to teach them what is good and bad from a young age. And as they get older, I’m sure it only gets worse. Just think of the teenage years!
Besides demanding constant attention and guidance, children are downright expensive. Having a child would add a shocking number of expenses for my husband and I to support. It’s not just about the baby’s basic needs, like diapers and clothes. It extends to things like toys, special foods, babysitters, daycare, and preschool just in the early years. Then, as they grow older, the expenses start to include cool clothes, cool toys, and extracurricular activities. And that’s just for the kid’s direct needs and wants! There are also the increased costs of health insurance and healthcare, a bigger house, time and energy to clean up after them, etc. Not to mention down the road, when you might be expected to pay for a car, college, and a wedding. Having a kid certainly takes its toll!
So why do people do it? There must be a reason that makes it all worth it. Perhaps even some of the reasons that I gave for wanting to have one. Yes, I definitely see that there are incredible costs to having a child, and I certainly don’t underestimate the amount of hard work that it takes to be a parent. But despite all of that, I still want one. And when the time is right, I feel certain that my husband and I will have one (or two!).
Which brings me back to baby fever. I know that my wish to have a baby right now isn’t logical, and that it would not be responsible to act on it. That’s the tough thing about baby fever, isn’t it? You only get it when you aren’t ready to have a baby. Otherwise, it’s just called pregnancy!
So for now, my husband and I are waiting. Based on the current state of our lives, I would estimate that we have another year or two until having a baby becomes truly plausible. And honestly, I think that’s probably a good thing. We still value having time to enjoy our marriage, just the two of us, before we bring another person into the mix. We still need time to grow and mature before we can feel 100% prepared to have a baby. Most of all, we still need time to crank up our financial status and become fully independent from our own parents before we have our own dependent child!
Until this baby fever subsides, I’ll probably still be fantasizing about pregnancy, cribs, and little baby giggles. But that’s okay, because it gives me something to look forward to and it keeps me moving toward it. In the meantime, I’m enjoying being married to my wonderful husband and taking care of our fur-and-feather-babies together (our cat, Booda, and our cockatiel, Rocky! Sorry, Marley— you’re still my baby even though you can’t live with me right now.)
P.S. Congratulations Melissa & Scott! When I saw the pictures of you two and Bella, I practically cried with happiness. She’s just incredible, and I’m so thrilled for you! What a beautiful family you have. <3