Do You Believe In Magic?

For the past few months, Cory and I have been struggling with Cody’s behavior and figuring out how to best discipline him. I’ve discovered that three year olds, AKA threenagers, are a whole other level of challenging. Forget “terrible twos,” it’s the threes that really get you! At least, that has been my experience so far.

Anyway, I started reading more parenting books, re-reading some of my old ones, and doing research on discipline methods. As an attachment parent, my first instinct has always been to try using “positive discipline” methods which do not include punishment. I’ve read books that have taught discipline methods such as simply staying calm, using specific ways of speaking, or relying on a toolbox of tricks. Some of them were helpful some of the time, but I struggled with not having a more streamlined, consistent, and most importantly effective way of disciplining. When my attempts at applying what I’ve learned failed, I would resort to anger, which wasn’t effective either and left me feeling guilty. (In other words, I’m the “bulldog” parent. Cory, on the other hand, tends to be the “pushover” parent.)

Finally, I found a resource that started to help. I found a website,, which provides a lot of realistic, practical, and evidence-based advice about a variety of parenting challenges. It helped me to better understand the developmental stage that Cody is in, and it also opened the door for me to accept that punishment, in the form of gentle consequences, does have a very important place in parenting. I highly recommend parents check it out to educate themselves and improve their parenting skills!

Still, even after my research, I was having a hard time applying a lot of what I learned to real-life situations with Cody. That’s when I came across a book called 1-2-3 Magic. I believe that this program is an answer to my prayers about how to handle Cody’s discipline! The ebook popped up as a suggestion for me when I was looking for a book to read on my tablet; I bought it and devoured it in two days. Since then, I have already seen excellent results, and I have felt very empowered and calm as a parent.

The 1-2-3 Magic system is simple, gentle, and effective. It involves cutting out unhelpful parental behaviors like nagging, yelling, lecturing, and spanking. Instead, discipline comes in the form of time-outs, or other consequences, which are enforced with very few words. There are also a handful of tools in the program for encouraging positive behavior. Most importantly, the program focuses on strengthening the parent-child bond, which is irreplaceable not only for disciplining effectively, but for enjoying our children!

We have been using 1-2-3 Magic for a week now, and of course we are still not perfect and never will be. But when we use it right, I am able to stay completely calm and still gain Cody’s compliance. It has honestly been a game-changer for me, even in this short amount of time. I was at the point where I admitted sadly to Cory that I wasn’t enjoying Cody anymore because of the constant struggles with his behavior. Now, I feel like a new parent, and I’ve been enjoying my son again because discipline is calm and quick. It is really a wonderful thing!

You can find out more about 1-2-3 Magic here. The book is available on every major ebook platform, or in physical form through many retailers. If it wasn’t clear already, I highly recommend this book for all parents!


There are no affiliate links in this post. I am simply a fan and I want to share my discovery!

Also note that 1-2-3 Magic is for children over the age of about 18 months to two years. “Discipline” for babies should consist mainly of prevention, redirection, and distraction. Consequences aren’t appropriate for these little ones, because they can’t understand at this age! 😉

Happy Two Months Birthday, Abigail!

On Saturday, Abigail turned two months old. It has really flown by even faster this time around! That’s probably because Cody is still keeping me busy. 😉

Abby has been an easy baby so far. She sleeps a lot, and in long stretches. I would estimate she sleeps about 14-16 hours per 24 hour period. At night, she wakes about two times to nurse, and usually a couple of other times just to wiggle around for a few minutes. Getting her to sleep at bedtime has been easy lately; I nurse her in our rocking chair, then bring her into bed and turn on the white noise and nurse her some more if she wants. She’s fallen asleep like that with no problems for the past few weeks.

Unlike Cody when he was a baby, she doesn’t nurse every time I offer. She tends to nurse less frequently than he did in general, and the sessions are also shorter. Still, she’s been gaining weight really well, and currently weighs just over 13 lbs, which is in the 90th percentile. She’s a chunker! In fact, she’s wearing size 3-6 month clothing now, as she grew out of her newborn and 0-3 month clothes very quickly.

Although she spends a lot of her time sleeping, she also has long periods of being awake and alert now. She is becoming quite vocal, and likes to have “cooing conversations” with us. She’s giggled a handful of times, but it’s still rare enough to be exciting when she does it. She smiles frequently, sometimes in reaction to people and other times for secret reasons only babies know.

As for crying, she doesn’t do much of it. She usually gives us many warnings before starting to cry. She will start “shouting” at us, with more frequent and louder noises, until we pick her up. The only times she cries are when we put her in her carseat, and the rare times when she’s truly upset because she wants to be held or nurse. She’s never cried for more than a minute, and usually it’s only for a few seconds. Of course, we spend a lot of time holding her and that helps keep her happy. But she’s also often content to lay in her playpen or her mat on the floor, or sit in her swing, for half an hour or so when we need to get things done.

Cory wears her in the ergobaby often, and she does well with that. She doesn’t like it when I wear her as much, I suspect because being so close to my chest makes her want to nurse. She often starts rooting around and getting fussy when I wear her, unless she’s really tired and falls asleep. But usually I can wear her to take Cody to the park and she’s content for a little while. Around the house, I typically prefer to just hold her and she seems to like that better.

Abigail took a bottle one time, but several other attempts have been rejected. She hasn’t taken to a pacifier either, though we haven’t tried very hard with that. She likes to suck on her hand, so a pacifier seems unnecessary.

She can now hold her head up, and she can push up a bit on her arms when she’s on her tummy. She’s close to rolling, but hasn’t quite gotten there yet. She will use her legs to stand now when we hold her upright, but she still needs a lot of support because she’s pretty floppy.

Cody has done wonderfully with her so far, and the transition has been very smooth. He is great at being gentle with her, and he likes to stroke her arms and head and tell me that he loves her. It’s super sweet! He’s a good big brother. 🙂

That’s about it! Life with two littles has been more challenging, but so far it’s not as hard as I thought. Probably because Abby is such an easy baby! Either way, we’re blessed.